Welcome to Dave O's Blog

There’s no question that it’s always amazing to say it’s the end of a decade and the beginning of a new one..  There was so much which has happened this decade not only to us all as a society, but to us all individually.   When reflecting on the past 10 years some moments I’ll never forget….

Most memorable historic moment:

For many 9/11 was probably the most memorable moment in history for us all.   My 9/11 story actually goes back to 9/10 as during that time I was Tour Managing They Might Be Giants.   We were in NYC and had the bands album release party.  The party went straight into an in-store signing at the downtown Virgin Records store.  It was at the stroke of midnight when the store opened up for the signing and the band holds the record of the most scans/sales in NYC on 9/11 as a result of the signing.

When it hit a little past 3am, I was on my way back to Long Island and it was then the following morning when I remember being woken up as one of the planes crashed into one of the towers…   At the time of waking up it was still on the news as ‘an accident’.  I called United right away as I didn’t want to wake my travel agent up and to see what other flights will be available (so I could hopefully transfer everyone immediately onto available seats).    It was while I was on the phone with the United Rep that I remember very clearly, she paused immediately what we were doing, and said to me “Oh My God!  Another plane crashed into the other tower”.   We both freaked out on the phone together.  A few minutes later it was the Pentagon then being hit…   Here I was on the phone with a total stranger and we couldn’t believe how this was possible and we were sharing the same feelings of disbelief.   It was one of the scariest moments more for the simple fact of just not knowing what to expect next or what was going to happen.   It wasn’t knowing where my brother was (which we heard from him hours later.   Fear, loss, pain, disbelief are all just a few of the words which described emotions and feelings racing through my mind.

As we were grounded from leaving (as airspace was shut down as well as the tunnels and bridges) I went on 9/12 into Manhattan via Long Island Rail Road.   The smell of burning jet fuel was strong enough in Long Island, I knew it couldn’t be any better in the city…   What I did witness was all of the city being one giant ghost town…   No taxi’s or cars driving up and down any streets, no airplanes flying above (occasional fighter jets instead), and total silence from anyone on the streets.   My city was wounded!   People weren’t talking to each other or playing music in bars (walking by many)…  People were just shocked.   I remember the first emergency service person I saw which just got off a shift of being at ground zero.  His scrubs were pretty beaten up.  He sat on the front hood of a car and his face was filled with so much disbelief that it was hard to witness.   His eyes had so much pain inside them as you know he witnessed things nobody should have to…  Then that night I went to Washington Square Park and lit candles with others all mourning for the devastation which took place to our city.   We chanted ‘Give Peace a Chance’ and many cried and held hands.   People were taping up and carrying ‘missing’ signs everywhere and those not holding signs did everything to show their love/support as we all didn’t know ourselves who we would bump into which may be carrying a sign of someone we knew.   We all have our stories about 9/11 but this was a big part in me leaving NY and moving out west.  Starting over…   I’m always a NYer at heart, but those last moments made it very rough to be able to cope and want to be on the east coast.   Change was very important to me.

Other very significant historical moments:

Obama becoming our President in a very powerful and historic election against Hillary Clinton, Bill Clinton leaves office (2001 and upsetting as he was the best), Bush leaving office (2009 – was a true celebration seeing his term over), seeing the most amazing fireworks ceremony on TV from the Olympics in Beijing, unemployment hitting high levels and the stock market crashing, seeing the auto companies all suffering dearly and asking for government bailouts, Hurricane Katrina and the damage it left for many, and unfortunately watching morale go down in so many with big dreams…

In reflecting, I put together a list of questions all which are to help me reflect.

What was the best concert I worked/attended this decade?

I’d have to say it was The Ramones anniversary.   This was days before Johnny passed away and all of us involved worked from the heart to make this a very memorable and special night for all those there.   The list of artists performing was massive.   During the event Rob Zombie went up on stage and called Johnny (as he was too sick to be at the show) and had the whole crowd do a huge ‘Hey Ho, Lets Go’ for him.   He told me how powerful of an effect that had on Johnny after and that it really was what he needed.   Days later getting the call that he died happily surrounded by friends really meant the world to me to help produce such a special night for all those attending.  The funeral was also filled with so much love that there’s no question his spirit will live on for many years to go…

What was the best tour I worked this decade?

I’d have to say Barry Manilow…   I worked for Barry a few months following 9/11 for a good year.   This was at a time in my life where I really didn’t want to live in NY and kind of be stuck in that rut…   I got offered to be his road manager and take care of the band, which I did.  We had a blast!  No question at times it was really rough being away from my family as it was just a very uncomfortable time in the world, but it was a big part of ‘my therapy’ on dealing with what happened.  Every night Barry did a song which he dedicated to NY and it always would give me the chills or make me have a couple tears drop.   He and I talked about 9/11 a few times and had a blast.   The other thing was we flew private and this was a time in my life where flying commercial was very difficult and scary…   I really enjoyed working for Barry.  Europe was also very special for me on this tour, but that will segue into my next question…

What was the most memorable conversation I had that decade?

There’s no question I could fill this with tons of conversations I’ve had over the past 10 years with everyone from world leaders to top celebrities.   I though have to say though that for me the most memorable conversation I had was in London in 2002 when I had a hard enough time flying overseas following 9/11.  It was pouring outside really bad and I was leaving “Club Attica” and heading back to my hotel.  The rain was pouring buckets so taking a taxi was necessary!   The driver asked me after I told him my hotel:  ‘Are you American’.   I of course answered back ‘Yes I am, from New York’.   He responded ‘I’m from Iraq’….   My stomach literally dropped out of my stomach and I thought I was not going to see my hotel…  Fear definitely filled me as well as hatred towards this stranger as it wasn’t what I expected to fall into, but then he proceeded to start a conversation.   He told me how sorry he was and that it really was very upsetting watching and reading about everything.  We started getting deeper into the conversation, and he was actually educating me on some other facts I didn’t know at that time…  How Bin Laden was actually trained originally by the US/CIA…  So many things we discussed which were eye opening to both of us.   That cab ride turned into a good 4-5 hour conversation in the cab with the pouring rain (literally it was like buckets were being thrown on the car) in the background.

I’ll never forget that conversation…   And as much as I was at first ready to dart out of that cab when he told me his background, it actually turned into being one of the best conversations I can remember…

What was one of the worst conversations I had this decade?

Lets just say in summing this one up (LOL), it had to do with a woman that I loved very much and was prepared to put a ring around her finger.   It was her tearing into me over a great deal of false bullshit which she totally believed from one of her jealous friends…   A story was manipulated and well, lets just say I felt defenseless, hopeless and it was the beginning of the end…   Never being in that type of situation before, I didn’t know how to react, what to do and I literally felt my heart being torn into pieces.   From feeling on top of the world, it felt like my world crumbled in the matter of hours over nonsense…

What was the best lesson I learned this decade (breaking it off into a few parts):

About Love:   That it can be the most amazing feeling in the world as well as the most painful…   I learned that when you truly give your heart to someone else, really be positive that you are sure…  True love doesn’t come often and when it does embrace it.   If it goes away, do whatever you can to let go and move on or else it’ll be a very painful journey…

About Life:  That we take so much for granted and can lose everything in a split second!   Enjoy every minute of life as if it’s your last minute.   Don’t be mean to people deliberately.   Tell people you care about how you feel about them and what they mean to you.   Be grateful and when times feel shitty in your world help someone out… A stranger… Someone in need…   Take action…

About Fear:  That it’s the root of most of our problems…   Facing your fears sometimes as rough as it can be is one of the hugest accomplishments one can do in their own personal growth…

Biggest lesson I learned this decade as a whole:  That sometimes you need to take big chances in life in order to move forward.   Sometimes the first thing which comes to mind is the worst thing to act upon so to slow down when something is sensitive…   If somethings meant to be, you can’t mess it up and if something fails that you put 100% into, don’t look at it as the end but the beginning…

What was my contribution to society this decade?

In the spirit of humanity, just trying to always do the right ethical thing…   Sometimes people will disagree with you and clearly I’m not right many times in life but I really try hard and have for years now to always just do the right thing…  Get involved in charity work, help a friend struggling or that just clearly needs an added hand.  There’s a poem I read by Sam Shoemaker many years ago called ‘I Stand by the Door’.

Here it is (don’t let where it says god scare you as everyone has a different interpretation of what god is).  More importantly what the message of this poem stands for in helping others is in many ways what I am happy doing:

I stand by the door.
I neither go too far in, nor stay too far out,
The door is the most important door in the world-
It is the door through which people walk when they find God.
There’s no use my going way inside, and staying there,
When so many are still outside and they, as much as I,
Crave to know where the door is.
And all that so many ever find
Is only the wall where a door ought to be.
They creep along the wall like blind people,
With outstretched, groping hands.
Feeling for a door, knowing there must be a door,
Yet they never find it …
So I stand by the door.

The most tremendous thing in the world
Is for people to find that door–the door to God.
The most important thing any person can do
Is to take hold of one of those blind, groping hands,
And put it on the latch–the latch that only clicks
And opens to the person’s own touch.
People die outside that door, as starving beggars die
On cold nights in cruel cities in the dead of winter—
Die for want of what is within their grasp.
They live, on the other side of it–live because they have not found it.
Nothing else matters compared to helping them find it,
And open it, and walk in, and find Him …
So I stand by the door.

Go in, great saints, go all the way in–
Go way down into the cavernous cellars,
And way up into the spacious attics–
It is a vast roomy house, this house where God is.
Go into the deepest of hidden casements,
Of withdrawal, of silence, of sainthood.
Some must inhabit those inner rooms.
And know the depths and heights of God,
And call outside to the rest of us how wonderful it is.
Sometimes I take a deeper look in,
Sometimes venture in a little farther;
But my place seems closer to the opening …
So I stand by the door.

There is another reason why I stand there.
Some people get part way in and become afraid
Lest God and the zeal of His house devour them
For God is so very great, and asks all of us.
And these people feel a cosmic claustrophobia,
And want to get out. “Let me out!” they cry,
And the people way inside only terrify, them more.
Somebody must be by the door to tell them that they are spoiled
For the old life, they have seen too much:
Once taste God, and nothing but God will do any more.
Somebody must be watching for the frightened
Who seek to sneak out just where they came in,
To tell them how much better it is inside.
The people too far in do not see how near these are
To leaving–preoccupied with the wonder of it all.
Somebody must watch for those who have entered the door,
But would like to run away. So for them, too,
I stand by the door.

I admire the people who go way in.
But I wish they would not forget how it was
Before they got in. Then they would be able to help
The people who have not, yet even found the door,
Or the people who want to run away again from God,
You can go in too deeply, and stay in too long,
And forget the people outside the door.
As for me, I shall take my old accustomed place,
Near enough to God to hear Him, and know He is there,
But not so far from people as not to hear them,
And remember they are there, too.
Where? Outside the door–
Thousands of them, millions of them.
But–more important for me–
One of them, two of them, ten of them,
Whose hands I am intended to put on the latch.
So I shall stand by the door and wait
For those who seek it.
“I had rather be a door-keeper …”
So I stand by the door.

Reflecting on life is always interesting…   The past 10 years I’ve worked hard at achieving many dreams of mine.   In some areas of life I’ve achieved some of these goals and in others I haven’t.   I’ve met some great people and some real idiots this decade!  I’ve had a ton of happy times, and many sad ones.   I’ve welcome life to the world and have said my share of good-byes..  I’ve had multiple employers and occupations…And the list of other events goes on and on… In all, I’m very happy 2010 is here!  When 2000 came, there’s no question that decade was also filled with lots of change for the world, society as a whole and for myself.   I can only hope this next decade is one filled with many better years for all of us!   That it’s filled with good health, love, happiness, growth and all the other things which are really important in life.

Thank you all for letting me share and reflect a little on my life and hopefully ya know a little more about me.
All the best to everyone in this coming decade!

-Dave O